WONDER BOY PT 3.

Dear readers,

Thank you so much for sticking with me – I’m so sorry about that late upload. Because of mock exams and Christmas I have had barely any free time but I hope you’re having a wonderful holiday and a well-deserved break.

This is the final segment of my Wonder Boy experience, which has been requested and I hope you enjoy it. Let me know what you want to know about my life next in the comments!

WB was in my thoughts a lot more than he should have been as I started Year 11. It was as if everywhere I turned there would be a reminder, and every time I saw the dress I had worn on Theme Night I had flashbacks. It sounds cheesy but I really hoped he would text and change his mind. I missed our conversations about really bizarre things and I wished that things hadn’t ended in such an awkward note.

At the end of September, I was at a friend’s house with members of our youth group. I had a very open and honest conversation with one of my male friends, who, although he was unable to advise me on what the cryptic message meant, said he knew Wonder Boy was a lovely person and was probably just as confused as I was. This instilled fresh hope in me and I decided to text WB, asking how he was. Big mistake.

Over that weekend, we had a very stilted, short text conversation which I sent the last message on and he never replied. It was clear that nothing between us was the same and he didn’t feel the same way at all.

Throughout October, the thought that burned in the back of my mind was Signal. I’ll call it that for the sake of privacy, but it was basically a gathering of church youth groups and WB would be there. I was dreading the 2nd of November, where my wounds would be opened again and would seemingly bleed in front of everyone. I felt like I was now boring my close friends by talking about WB and how I felt, so I closed off and tried to choke down the sick feeling rising in my stomach. It sounds completely stupid, but after humiliating myself twice over text, I was in no hurry to see him again.

The day arrived, as I knew it would and, stupidly, I made extra effort with my appearance. Although my brain shouted that he didn’t like me, my feelings took over and hoped and prayed for something to happen.

I will spare you the details of that day. It still, nearly 2 months later, hurts me to remember how awkward it was, how WB didn’t make an effort to talk to me once, and how he acted like we weren’t ever friends. I was so upset and disappointed that I gave myself abdominal migraines, really bad stomach pains caused by stress which I used to have regularly and had not had for nearly 6 months before then.

I left Signal feeling completely ridiculous. I had been foolish to kid myself into believing that nothing bad would happen, and I was more foolish to worry myself so much over a boy that I made myself ill.

Now, almost two months later, it still hurts. I won’t lie and say I’m over it, because I’m not. There are still things that remind me of him, and as much as it hurts me, I can’t seem to stop thinking about it. I hope that sharing my experience with others might help me achieve closure. I hope I’m not the only girl to go through an experience like this. On New Year’s Eve, I will do something I have not had the courage to do yet, as ridiculous as it seems. I will delete WB’s text messages from my phone and completely try and forget about him.

Thank you for all your love and support, have a great New Year and let’s smash 2019,

Love from

d-emilia x

4 thoughts on “WONDER BOY PT 3.

  1. Emilia, bless you. Rejection sucks, not having the person you think at the time is the one for you not liking you back is the worst feeling ever & it’s something I think we all unfortunately go through. That whole experience sounds horrible – I really hope you experience closure soon because one day you will find somebody who makes you so happy. I know this isn’t really the same but my now ex boyfriend broke up with me at this time last year, after dating for a long time, I was crushed & it didn’t help that we were in the same friendship group so every time I saw him or anything that reminded me of him, it broke me. Having said that, now I finally feel like I’m over it – it all takes time, although deleting his messages from you phone is hard & not what you want to do, feel proud of yourself for taking that step. You’ve got this! Great to see you back posting, I hope you had a lovely Christmas & haven’t worked too hard, you deserve a break after all – I hope the mock exams went well & that you have a very happy new year 🙂 ❤

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    1. Thank you so much Lydia, a comment like that means a lot. I’m so glad you have got over your ex, that must have been very hard. Thank you for all your support on the blog, have a very happy new year ❤️

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  2. Hang in there! Yes, it may seem incredibly hard to forget about him but all wounds heal with time. Just keep your head up and focus on the people you have in your life right now. Your taking the right step by deleting those messages. You seem like an amazing person. Have a great year! – Heidi

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